Friday, March 8, 2013

Making it real (and a plea for some advice)

I have now been a "stay at home mom" for longer than I worked at my last job.   I have enough distance from it to definitively say that it was the absolute right decision.  I Hated my job.  I should have known better; the only other time I had a traditional office-desk-type-job was in college, and I wanted to tear my hair out every day.  Sitting at a desk, all day every day, is torture for me.  So even though this was in my field, it couldn't overcome how terrible it is for me to sit in one place looking at spread sheets all day.  On top of that, I love being home with the girls.  When MJ was this age it KILLED me to drop her at daycare every day, knowing I was missing 90% of her waking hours.  I can't get enough of the smiles, coos, and belly laughs.  Although the days are occasionally a bit repetitive, we've managed to mix things up enough to avoid most of that.

So now I'm home.  I've been home with Greta for 7 months, but during that time MJ has continued to go to preschool most days.  At first it was because I had a newborn and needed the extra help.  Then it was because we bought a rental property and needed to get it up and running.  And now, there are no more justifiable reasons.

In about a week, that will no longer be the case.  I'll have both girls home with me, full time, and I'm a bit terrified.  I know this is what SAHMs do, and I'm excited about all the fun things we'll get to do.  It will be good for Greta, because she loves when her sister's around.  But how do people get anything done?  As it is now, with MJ gone for a good chunk of the day, I feel like I'm still going from sun up to sundown getting things done.  But now I'll have two rugrats around, one of whom is quicker at making messes than I am at cleaning them up.

Additionally, without any family around and a husband who works many evenings and weekends, I'll have few chances for a break.  If I could just drop them at a grandparent's house for a few hours in order to get things done that would be... amazing.  Or if the hubs came home at normal times every day and I could take an hour or two to do something.  But I won't have that.

So how do you do it?  What are some tips you'd like to pass along on how to keep your sanity?  How to get the things done that need to get done?


  1. Why does MJ have to stop going to preschool? Could you send her just two days a week to give you a small break? If it's any consolation, I just have one, and I still don't get anything done.

  2. It does seem like any stay at home moms I know have several organized activities and also some breaks, whether that be through 2x weekly preschool, moms day out, gym childcare, or a sitter that comes over at least once a week. So hopefully you can swing something like that! Good luck!

  3. I've got an almost 3 yr old and an 8 month old. The older does preschool 2 mornings a week. It's a good "break" but not really restful, or easy to get things done, because I've got the baby who doesn't take a morning nap. I do have a moms group once a week with childcare for both, and I'd highly recommend a playgroup. All of those things help maintain sanity. But as for getting things done...forget about it..or redefine it. Before I had my second, a mom of three gave me this sage advice: lower your expectations...and then lower them again.